The Truth About Happiness and Success
What if I told you that you have been hijacked by your mind?
You would probably think that I’m crazy and you would probably want a hit of the crack that I appear to be smoking. Well in truth, I am dead serious and at this moment, completely sober and this article may in fact rewire and change your whole perception of who you are and what’s possible.
But before you can resonate with any of this, you first must take back control of the throttle that your ego has so desperately wrapped itself around. You see, what most people fail to realize is that you are not your mind and until your realize this critical fact, you will forever be a slave to your mind.
Once you can disidentify from your mind by observing it, it’s no longer in control and you can use your mind as a tool, as opposed to being taken over by it. It’s almost like human beings were created with a glaring flaw. A flaw that would prove so destructive that it would poison any and all chance of happiness.
As humans we walk through life in a daze and our minds are constantly running all over the place, doing whatever it can to escape the very moment that we’re in. If you go about your day as normal, you will witness your mind wander continuously.
For example, you’re at work but desperately looking to the weekend for salvation. Or maybe you’re at the gym working out but instead of focusing on the set you’re doing you begin to let your mind drift off.
Next, imagine you’re at a bar and you see a gorgeous girl. Do you bring your attention to the present moment, walk up to her and meet her. Or do you retreat to your mind, and wander what you should say and if she will like you, and then do you justify your lack of action by coming up with a creative reason for why you shouldn’t talk to her.
Your mind is stopping you from talking to her because of it’s unconscious fear of rejection. So long that your’e inside your head, your ego is in control and anything that may potentially hurt your ego, you will avoid.
When you bring your attention away from mind activity and into the now, your ego no longer exists. Fear in all of it’s forms disappears and you are truly free. Furthermore, it’s only when you are deeply present that true happiness can arise.
Projecting Fulfillment into the Future
Our mind likes to do whatever it can to keep us out of the very moment that we’re in. It pushes our very happiness and fulfilment into the future. And in doing so, the present moment, this moment right here, becomes reduced to a mere stepping stone into future without any real value.
Everything we do in life becomes a chronic obsession to arrive, to have and to attain. The enjoyment from our moment to moment life is gone as everything becomes a means to an end.
We tell ourselves that we’ll be happy when we have that job, that car, that perfect girlfriend or those six pack abs. But as long as you’re projecting your happiness into the future, your mind will keep it there. What you need to understand is that to the ego there is no present, only past and future.
If you’re identified with your mind and seeking fulfilment in the future, your mind will always keep it in the future. What people initially think will make them happy, inevitably makes them feel empty again.
When you seek happiness through ego validation, it quickly wears off and before you know it, you need another fix. So long that you’re seeking happiness in the future through catering to your ego’s need, you will never truly be happy.
And as a result, any and all relationships and interactions will secretly have a hidden agenda. There will be an outcome, to feel validated and to give your ego a more complete sense of self.
By all means have a vision for yourself, go after your dreams, build an incredible physique and date amazing women. But don’t do so on the premise that it will make you happy. The true power and fulfillment that you get from working towards your vision comes not from the end result, but from how deeply it brings you into the present moment.
To truly succeed and create the life you want, you must honor the now. You must learn to utilize your mind and not become hijacked by it. When your attention is in the present moment, all limiting beliefs will have disappeared and you will be in an empowered state that is clear, focused and confident.
In pursuing your dreams and taking action, you will have strengthened your presence power and taken control of your mind. This is the ultimate form of freedom.
Letting go of the Ego
I want you to imagine that your entire life up until this moment has been erased. Everything you know of till this very second is gone; your name, your possessions, your past experiences and your identity!
As Tyler Durden said in Fight Club, “It’s only after we’ve lost everything that we’re free to do anything.” What was he talking about? This is so much deeper than losing your job, your car, your money or your looks. This is about losing your ego!
Without any past there is no pride, no fear, no insecurity, no judgements, no mental labelling and no emotional complex’s and thus, you can simply be! That being is the very essence of who you are.
To achieve this state you need to bring your fullest attention to what you’re doing, to the very moment that you’re in, only then will you feel peace, aliveness and joy.
Your life will flow with much more grace and ease and things will start to go your way as your mind will no longer be holding you back and it will no longer become dependent on an outcome. Your mind will no longer be taking you out of the moment, which is all we ever have.
How will this transform your life?
Without any ego identification, there is nothing holding you back. In the words of Jordan Belfort (Wolf of Wall Street), “Most people tell themselves this wild story about why they can’t take action and in truth, the story they tell themselves is exactly what’s holding them back from being successful.
They complain and justify and that stops them from moving forward.” With no ego, there is no fear of failure! Your excuses and false rationalizations will go out the window. You will have empowered yourself by taking complete and absolute responsibility for everything in your life.
Only once you have accepted that the buck stops with you and only you, only then will you be free to conquer your goals and to take action. And only then will you stop subconsciously sabotaging any and all attempts at fulfilment, success and happiness. “No fear no distractions, the ability to let that which does not matter truly slide” (Fight Club).
Actionable Steps to Success
1. Know that you are not your mind
Understand deeply that you are not your mind. Treat your mind and it’s thoughts as a six year old child. Observe it, don’t judge it. So long that you are observing your mind and not identifying with it, you will withdraw all power if has over you.
For example, if you catch your mind telling you a story about why you can’t succeed or why you shouldn’t take action, observe the thought. Overtime these thoughts and self limiting beliefs that have been emotionally tied to your ego will no longer bear influence over you.
2. Bring your awareness into the present moment
Keep your mind focused and honed in on the present moment. There is a whole realm of intelligence far beyond thought. Without deep presence your ability to execute and perform at a high level will be greatly hindered. As Bruce Lee said, “Empty your mind. Be formless, shapeless like water.”
Let your mind become still and intensely focused on the present moment. This is where you are your most competent and the most effective. You are ready, alert and adaptable. If you find your mind is wandering and taking you out of the moment, try to catch it.
If you can observe your mind and it’s thoughts, you will be back into presence. With time, you will be able to spend greater lengths of time in the now. Being in the now will put you in the best possible state. And it is the quality of your state that determines your success and happiness.
3. Create a vision
See things as they are and then see them better than they are. Decide how you want your life to be and make it so! A clear, identifiable and purpose driven vision is what separates the successful from the unsuccessful.
If you don’t have a vision for where you want to be, it will be really hard to get motivated. But when you have created a strong vision for your life and for yourself, it’s easy to be motivated and nothing can get in your way. Nothing can stop you from taking right action. And with this vision you unleash a greater sense of purpose, drive and ambition.
4. Have a strategy
To build an incredible physique or to succeed in any pursuit, you must have a strategy in place. You must commit to a plan! Unfortunately there is so much information available to us that we become overly convoluted and have no idea where to start.
We keep changing things up, complicating things, trying new things, constantly looking for a different approach when we never put the initial one into action. We feel as if we are moving forward but in actuality we haven’t even left the driveway.
It’s as if you’re about to embark on a journey but keep stalling, wondering if you’re taking the right approach. It’s okay to fail, it’s okay to make mistakes, this is what being human is all about! But for gods sake, take action and adjust as necessary along the way.
This is one of the reasons why I think having a coach is so effective! This is also why I have worked with many coaches throughout my life in several different areas. Not only are you learning from someone who has walked the walk and helped hundreds of people succeed, but you have invested in them. You are accountable to them.
Final Comment
I have spent the last four months immersing myself in the teaching of Eckhart Tolle and Practicing the Power of Now. It has had such an incredible impact on my life that I can’t help but share it! Letting go of mind identification and staying deeply present will improve your life in all areas.
Everything in life will bring you much more joy and people will sense this deeply sincere and incredible energy about you that they can’t help but be drawn to. Further, you will become so deeply grounded in yourself and in the moment that vary rarely will anyone or any circumstance have the power to upset you or get you off your game.
In this weeks episode of the road to ripped podcast, Christopher Walker and I discuss freeing yourself from this false mind made identity and escaping the addictive victim mindset. Take a listen:
[audio://traffic.libsyn.com/roadtoripped/Destroying_the_Victim_Identity_-_Road_to_Ripped_Podcast.mp3]Subscribe to the Road to Ripped Podcast Here
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You can listen to Tolle on spotify
[…] things, and I like the focus in his work. He followed up those post suggestions with an additional game-changer post. Enjoy. That last blog ties in well with something from Scott Krall’s […]
Great article! But it is really hard to put the practice of the present into actionable steps.
The reason is because my mind never stops thinking! Even during the night, which prevents me from decent night of sleep! lol
Every time I try to meditate I have over 100 thoughts:( I try to observe but then I attach to them always.
Do you listen to the “practicing the power of now” audio in addition to meditation?
How long did it take you to experience the present moment daily?
Dude listen to practicing the power of now. I never did conventional meditation. Listen to practising the power or now everyday for at-least 20 minutes and by day 10 you should notice a massive difference. I also do a sleep hypnosis audi at night that works beautifully.
”When you read something for the second time, you don’t see something that wasn’t in it before, you see something in yourself that wasn’t there before.”
The first time I read this article I memorized the quote “It’s only when you are deeply present that true happiness can arise.” I kept thinking about that for a few months. I found out that sometimes we lack the awareness of understanding certain thoughts and we need to grow in consciousness before we can understand the idea.
Now when I re-read this article what popped into my mind was the idea of being present before taking action and therefore letting go of the self-limiting beliefs about ourselves. This is huge. Too many times we identify ourselves with our self-image and stop ourselves from doing something because “that’s not like us”. As I start growing in awareness I’m realizing that what we call “us” is really just perception. As Elliot Hulse said, we’re free to recreate ourselves whenever we want but we can only do this when we stop identifying ourselves with our mind or self-image.
And you’re right Greg, listening to the audio version of The Power of Now is so much more powerful than reading the book :)
Btw, I found this really cool quote by Viktor Frankl: “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lays our growth and our freedom.”
Keep writing man, I’ll be reading it.
This is an absolutely beautiful realization you have made Radu. Thanks so much for sharing it.
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I loved the article and am really happy that I stumbled on your site. My favourite bit though is the first comment from Ralphael. Somewhat missing the point:) I have started on my journey to the now and am also writing about it. I do wonder if it is a tough sell? People, including myself are interested in hearing about how external circumstances are going to change there lives rather then accepting responsibility and looking inward for their happiness.
ok greg, a question for ya…
I ve just finished to read the power of now and must admit it’s amazing… the only thing is that it is very hard for me to avoid the ”wandering” of my mind….
Have u got any tips which helped u to focus on the now and to controll your mind???
for example,what do you focus on when you’re let’s say walking???? how are u able not to think…???
ps the moment that I manage to focus on the now are the 5% of my day…. I m worry I won’t be able to do that….
PLEASE GIVE ME SOME TIPS OLD SPORT
Great work reading the book! Think of living in the present moment as a skill set you need to develop with time. Everytime you realize you’re not present (aka your mind is wandering) you become present. This is because the present watcher has caught yourself thinking. At first you may only be able to spend brief periods in the present moment. With daily practice the gaps will become longer. I also recommend practicing 20 minutes of meditation per day. Use the meditation to focus on your breathing and being highly focused and alert. If a thought comes in, observe the thought and come back to presence.
great, thanks!!!how many time did it take u to stay focus on the present time for decent period???
It takes a few weeks to really get it down. You really have to listen to the audio everyday for 20-30 minutes.
is there the audio you’re talking about on youtube?? because I haven’t purchased the book but read a pdf I ve found on google….
If u told me where to find it for free that would be amazing.. (just if U know it ,of course)
THANKS GREG
No audio on youtube. You have to purchase it on amazon or itunes.
Hey man.
I just wanted to run a quick question by you. I have started your muscle building program and have been doing it for a month now and i am making great strength gains. However dialing in the number of calories i need to eat a day to gain around 0.5lbs a week has been difficult. I am around 160lbs with 10% bf at 6ft. I started out as the calculator suggested with around 2400 cals (maintenance) and 3000 on training days (600 surplus) but i saw no gains in weight. I have increased my calories by 300 on both rest and workout days from week to week trying to find the right surplus and i am now at the stage where come next week my calories are going to be at 3500 cals on rest days and 4100 cals on workout days. Haha tbh im a little bit nervous about how high its getting! I am in no way a hard gainer as i dropped 20lbs this summer to get to 160lbs. I just find that when i track my calories and macros and keep my food choices clean my intake needs to be high. What are your thoughts man, your insight would be much appreciated. I may just need to keep going, and may have to accept that’s the way my body responds.
also i read somewhere i think that youv got another program coming out, is that true? always love reading your stuff. Thanks
Wow, that’s a super high calorie intake. I’m blown away! If you’re getting that high in calories you can definitely add some junk foods like icecream, cereals or pancakes to hit your macros. It will definitely make it easier to eat so many calories and gain weight. I’m really surprised at how high you have to go.
Yeah man it baffles me, what i find quite strange also is, through the whole process of increasing my calories my weight is staying the same, doesn’t seem to fluctuate at all. when i was eating 2400-2600 cals a day i wasn’t losing weight i was still maintaining, it was only when i drop below this that i lose weight. however to maintain it seems that it ranges from 2400-3500 cals so far.
Hi Greg!
Because of tight schedule, i wont be able to take in the recommended calorie surplus since im on a lean bulk. So ive decided to buy whey protein. I know that there are a lot of BS supplements and shakes in the market. What brand is then an effective and safe whey protein?
Gold standard ON whey is solid.
Forgot to ask, when is the best time to drink this whey protein? :)
You drink it 30 minutes after training or as a small meal during the day.
Hi Greg!
Ive done a little tweaking on chest specialization and bicep specialization to give way for muscle up training.
Workout A:
incline presses- 5 6 8 8 8
flat bench- 6 8 10
lateral raises- 3 sets of 8-12
pistols + calf raises- 3 sets of 4-6 + 10-12
Workout B:
Weighted chin ups- 5 6 8
barbell curls- 3 sets of 6-10
incline db curls- 2 sets of 8-12
face pull- 3 sets of 8-12
muscle up- 3-5 sets of 1-2 reps
Your thoughts on this Greg? I love training for muscle ups! Thanks in advance! :)
You need to practice muscle ups when your back and biceps are relatively fresh. I would suggest doing muscle ups on workout A after lateral raises. And I would do pistols and calf raises on workout B at the end.
The muscle ups shouldn’t negatively impact recovery, so it’s fine to do them on workout A. Just don’t do too many. 3 sets of 1-3 reps should work well. When they’re easier you can do 3 sets of 5.
For the past 2 weeks, ive done muscle ups on workout B and i was able to do it. maybe because of weighted pull ups, muscle ups became easier to perform at that moment because my body seem lighter to lift up because the extra weight has been removed. so far, muscle ups were a success to execute. I’m worried that when i perform muscle ups on workout A, i wont be able to do it because my body isnt warmed up for a muscle up. :)
You can keep doing it in Workout B then.
Hey Greg!
Im quite curious. Which do i follow? The 16-18hr fast or eat 6-8hrs after waking up? What if my last meal ends at 9pm. That means i will eat my first meal at 1pm if i follow the 16-18hr fast. but what if i woke up at 10am? do i follow the 16-18hr fast and eat at 1pm or wait 6-8hrs till i eat. so that means i’l have my first meal at around 4pm. Sometimes if i wake up late, I’m only hungry after 5hrs even though the 16-18hr fast has ended. but im worried that if i prolong the fast to more than 18hrs, i might be in a catabolic state. Advice please :)
I actually do more moderate intermittent fasting. So I suggest eating your first meal around 5-6 hours after rising. And then having 2 more meals in a 7-9 hour window. So if you wake up at 9am you might have your first meal at 3pm, second at 7:30 and a final meal at 11pm before going to bed. That said, none of this really matters. I just found this strategy to work best for me. If I sleep in and eat too soon after waking it doesn’t work as well. So I always push my first meal about 5-6 hours after rising. Some days are more but it’s always at-least 5 hours without food after getting up.
Hi Greg!
Im now done with s&d2. im gonna start chest specialization. At the end of s&d2, my incline barbell bench press is 1 x bw for 5 reps. Now since im going to do chest specialisation, flat bench press is included. how much weight should i start for 6 reps? :)
You should be stronger on flat bench. You’ll have to test it out and see for your self. Maybe start 10-20 lbs heavier than incline and see how that feels.
Hi Greg!
I’m 5’5 and 125 pounds. On training days, how many cups of rice should i eat? Im on a lean bulk and following your muscle building program. thanks!
As many as it takes to hit your carb numbers. You can use a calorie counter website or app to calculate that.
Hey Greg just wanted to ask you one question. For either of the program if you plan to drink during the night you restrict calories during the day and count the alcohol calories correct?
Yes ideally. Although I have found that if I am sticking to liquor only and limit the number of drinks to 3-4 then I can keep my diet unchanged without affecting fat loss. Usually with alcohol in the evening my activity level goes up and off sets some of the alcohol calories ingested.
Hi Greg!
Ive been following kinobody muscle building program for 5 months now. Ive definitely gained strength but for the past 8 weeks, Ive been hitting plateaus on incline bench press RPT so i change the rep schemes. but why is it that every 4 weeks, i hit a plateau? So for the past 8 weeks, ive already changed the rep scheme 2 times. and just now, i failed on my 3rd set so i have to change the rep scheme again. i was able to only do 8 reps instead of 10.
rep scheme:
first 3 months: 5 6 8
4th month: 4 5 7
5th month: 6 8 10
so now going on my 6th month, i hav to change the rep scheme again.
thanks in advance :)
Yes this will happen. We tend to stall every 3-6 weeks once we’re passed the beginner/intermediate stages. Another option would be to switch to dumbbell incline bench presses for a couple months, then go back to barbell. For dumbbell I’d recommend using a rep interval. Example 3 sets – 4-6, 6-8, 8-10. When you can do the top end of the rep range you’ll increase the weight.
Been reading his stuff too great article! What’s your thoughts on creatine causing baldness? And raising DHT?
Great article Greg, I do have a couple of non-related questions:) firstly, I am now bulking and have gone back to eating more meals. It hasn’t gone very well. I’m always tired. How do you go about bulking ?I know you’re Said that you enjoy the energy boost that comes from fasting but Also that it can be hard to fast Wille bulking, perhaps you’ve Written about this in th past and could direct me. Also, While your fasting and drinking, do you include the time that your drinking in the eating Windoww?:)
Well with bulking it’s just a matter of hitting your calories and macros. So as long as you’re eating at a modest surplus you can fast. Maybe just fast 4 hours per day. So you’d have lunch, dinner and late night meal. Include plenty of carbs and even a desert here or there if necessary. Shouldn’t be hard to hit your calories.
as master oogway said
yesterday is history
tomorrow is a mystery
but today is a gift
that is why it is called
the present.
nice article!
Hey Greg, this q is non related to your article. But i was wondering that if i take a pre workout supplement would it cause an insulin spike. Any advice or recommendations of what to have before weights. its just that im eating at lunch then hitting the gym at 6.
Thanks
I honestly wouldn’t worry too much about spiking insulin. At the end of the day it won’t matter. As long as you’re in a deficit, fat loss will happen. I prefer a cup of coffee before training as a pre workout.
Thanks for an amazing article, Greg.
I do run track, but I find your advises about diet, training and life philosophies extremely useful.
This article is the mental game in a nutshell.
You’re an amazing personality, Greg. Way to go
Thanks a lot man!
Very very powerful. Thank you for this
Greg,
This is what I needed to read today. This year I have successfully lost 45 pounds and at 49 years of age, I feel (and look) like I’m back in my early 30s. Of course this is all thanks to my change in eating habits, a good fitness trainer, and persistence.
Lately, my biggest fear is gaining it back. This article help me put my fear to rest.
Thanks.
Joe.
Los Angeles.
Very deep, I like it!
Hi Greg,
I have definitely been guilty of letting my mind wander into negative thought patterns. Too many times when i’ve been on the receiving end of an inappropriate and frankly untrue comment I’ve let it penetrate my mind and hinder me in many different areas. I think almost all of us can identify with that internal dialogue that takes place when we try to figure out negative stuff and 99% of the time it is usually meaningless bullshit!
There is no doubt about it, staying present and truly living by the ideal of staying present will make everyone more robust and rooted in self confidence as we rely on our own presence to keep us strong, and truly let slide anyone, anything and everything that does not contribute to our progression in life. I truly believe that we can only conquer life until we have first conquered our minds! This approach to living is certainly not easy as an intelligent mind will be very quick to analyse all sorts of things and think of possible outcomes all the time. However a lot of the time it’s usually completely unnecessary to do this and our intelligence should be harnessed in a far more efficient and productive way. I find it funny how at times the mind can be the most intelligent but stupidest thing in the world! Its like we are given this incredibly powerful tool but don’t know how to control it. Anyway, awesome blog entry, awesome podcast. Keep it up!
Laurence
Hey bro, this post is DEFINITELY your greatest masterpiece!! Well done!!
I have always been fit, healthy, and able to see my abs. I get asked how all the time and people tell why they can’t in so many ways, shapes, or forms. It’s because I don’t let fear (or try not to, I’m not perfect) get in my way. I defined fear a few years back as a negative perception of a future event. Fear is usually tied into the future and about something in the negative (pretty much restated my definition ha ha). Anyways, it is as you said, that when we live in the present and learn to savor the here and now it removes the anxiety and fear that comes with living in the future.
Plan for the future, but don’t reside in it!
The part I loved the most in the article was about not identifying with your mind. It’s amazing how effective this principle is and you genius-ly summed it up in a brief article, amazing!!
As Bruce says, “It’s not about the daily increase but daily decrease, hack away at the unessential.” You hacked away and left us only with the best material and information. You can go to any fitness blog for “how’s” and “what’s”, but what I really admire about you and Chris is you address the “why’s” and the mental aspect that so many gloss over.
Keep up the great work man!!
Thanks a lot Aaron! And that is a great perspective on fear, I wholeheartedly agree.
The best article you have ever written Greg. Period.
Resonates on so many levels with me.
Just bought ‘The power of now’ yesterday, gonna start reading it today.
Keep up the excellent work.
Cheers, Matt
This means a lot Matt!
I’d also look into the Eckhart Tolle audio tapes. I’ve listened to practicing the power of now about a half dozen times in the last few months. Every time I listen to it I become more and more present, less identified with my mind and I have more and more break through’s.
We as human beings are so caught up in our minds nowadays that we let it control all of our decisions. We’re trying to control it all up here when we should really be letting it flow down to our bodies and breathe into our balls! We’re so tight, regressive, closed off and shrugged that we’re blocking all of our energy channels and oxygen that flows to our bodies, yet we try to find the solution in our heads when we should really open up our bodies and start feeling.
Great post Greg!! Keep doin what you’re doin!
Awesome insight man! Love it.
Wow Greg absolutely inspiring post! Your authentic and altruistic content is a far cry from other fake alpha websites like Bold and Determined haha. By far one of my favorite life/ fitness resources on the net. Keep the posts coming!
great article greg !